I have recently been accused of being vindictive. Cynical, maybe, vindictive, not at all. I had a discussion with someone who believes they know me in which they said that I was vindictive. They accused me of wanting my son to get close to my boyfriend and forget his father. As much as this person wants to believe that it true it is not.
I do want Reid and Everett to be close. I want Reid to have close relationships with lots of people, including his father. I disagree wholeheartedly with many things his father says and does, but I would never try to discourage their relationship. The main reason is that I don't want Reid to grow up to resent me for making the choices he should be making. I want him to make decisions based on his experiences, not mine.
Another reason I wouldn't do that is well, I just don't care enough about his father to make that sort of effort. Don't get me wrong, I don't want him dead, hurt or otherwise incapacitated, but in general do not care. I was, in this person's defense, once vindictive where Chris was concerned. I cared then, and wanted him to hurt as badly as I did. I am over that.
I have grown as a person. I have sincerely gotten in touch with my inner hippie, and love her! I have also gotten in touch with the wishful, child-like expectations of the world part of me, and she continues to get hurt, but I love her. I have also become the phoenix. I have risen from the ashes of my past, and am becoming a whole new person. God gave me a new life when I was saved, and my environment has taught me that like the Phoenix, I can rise above the crumpled, scared, angry person I used to be.
Before throwing accusations my way, please ensure that they are true. This person says he is a good "reader" of people, well, I want to laugh at him. So many of the people who he trusts, would throw him under the bus in a second. They see through him, and his delusions. I kind of feel sorry for the guy, but like my ex-husband, I just don't care enough about him for that.
The Hippie Phoenix Fairy flies away!
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